February 18, 2005
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Woe.
(sorry, this blog was intermittently interrupted by screaming 4 year old who had badly stubbed her toe and bleeding all over the floor while the hub is still tootling with his remote control car in the garage.)
So the boy gets home last week and gleefully tells me he's been fired. Fired for looking for another job while he's currently employed. "It's okay", he assures me - the people he was talking to are definitely, positively, abso-fucking-loot-lee interested in hiring him for much much more money then he was making. Don't make it a big deal, don't get on his back, just chill and think positive.
Yeah.
So it's a week later - no phone call, several appointments that mysteriously got cancelled, and here I sit. My hub is playing with his remote control car in the garage instead of fucking out there getting some money.
A word to any males who read this: Don't fuck with a woman's security. Especially a woman who gave up a six-figure income to mother her kids until they were five. Especially a woman who had real responsibility, worked till 2am some nights and juggled a staff of 8. I am that woman, and you bleating about how you hate the industry you are in and how you can't handle the commute and how you only did it for me and the kids.
Fuck. Right. Off.
Listen. You could have jumped careers any time you wanted before kids. It would have just been us two, sailing along on our raft of pot and booze and clubs and expensive meals and live music and art galleries with a brioche and a cappuccino on Sunday mornings over the paper. I told you many times to take a risk, take that jump off the cliff into the unknown.
You didn't.
So fuck off you big baby. Fuck your moaning about how your life is over and you don't want it to be over. IT IS FUCKING OVER. It's about the kids now. You and I are mired in a sea of school uniforms, mortgage payments, crayon scribbles, half chewed bananas on the $5000 couch and disapproving teachers. So get over yourself. Get over your lost youth, missed opportunites and ships in the night. No one cares anymore. Especially me.
I just spent entire day consumed by others. My breakfast was a lecture from the kindergarten teacher, my lunch an expedition to the Toy Store in track of washable crayons and my dinner has just been gobbled up by concern, kisses, bandaids and reassurances. Where do you get off thinking there is a 'you' anymore? Why are you entitled to that and I not?
If we both think like that, we shouldn't have had children. And I couldn't bear to think that my children wouldn't be around. They consume me and they define this part of my life. I know this all fleeting, why don't you?
Trust me, it's a lot more bearable when you start enjoying the responsibility.
Get your arse off that seat and get a job, you bore me.
Comments (8)
high five.
You GO girl! Men are selfish bores alot of the time, aren't they? Hang in there
Really well ranted. I hope the job happens.
He didn't just turn 40, did he? This sounds all too familiar to me. I hope someone puts a firecracker under his arse and gets him moving soon!
He wil get a job. Things will get better. If he is not working why don't you leave him with the kids and have a couple of days to yourself? just a thought.
similar pattern repeating itself? hope he gets off his butt.
WORD. Many standing ovations. Why do men take *so* long to grow up???
You won't believe me, since I'm a guy, but I'm with you on every word. It may be true that all men (including me) are bores, but we're not all bores in the same way. I LOL'ed my way through this entire rant, and when I wasn't laughing I was applauding. (Laughing in a *good* way, I should say. This is not to suggest that the situation is a bit funny. Personally, I prefer to laugh myself silly while coping with terrible crises, and I strongly suspect you are the same way. You're just a far better ranter.)
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