October 5, 2002
-
Notes to Self.
NTS: Do not ever plan to garden on the weekend. It will rain.
NTS: If you make a long list of things to do - you will only end up hiding the list and eating an entire bar of Cadbury's Fruit and Nut instead. Make short 'doable' lists.
NTS: Lenny Kravitz is a great way to start off Sunday.
NTS: If you are going to fall off the 'perfect pregnancy' wagon and drink a glass of wine - make it GOOD stuff, will ya? The heartburn and nausea occasioned from the flagon of Chateau Bilgewater really isn't worth it.
NTS: When you come in on Saturday afternoon, that flashing light on the answering machine is your MIL whining about how lonely she is and how terrible you are. Don't listen to it. Your blood pressure needs all the help it can get.
NTS: Maybe if you spent the one day a week you get childfree doing something FUN, you might be less of a bitch the other 6 days.
NTS: Do not fall for marketing gimmicks with respect to food. Your kid hates it all. Give in gracefully.
NTS: Stop feeling guilty about letting your child watch videos on rainy days. Lots of mothers do it, and not all of their kids grow up to be drooling delinquents.
NTS: Bacon sandwiches are not nutritious, healthy pregnancy food. You WILL look like a latter day Elvis iffen you don't cut them out.
NTS: He won't change. He wants to change, but he can't. Deal with it in whatever way you deem best, but FUCKING DEAL WITH IT.
NTS: The battery recharger never has batteries in it. So go out and buy some cheap ones, you aren't saving any money.
NTS: Stop feeling guilty about being online. If you were watching TV or reading a book, no one would raise an eyebrow.
Comments (18)
I love you.
You started off my day with a list of smiles that I could completely relate to. Bless your heart...
I should try to remember those things, as well...
It's good to see that you are keeping some of your sense of humor alive and well. I'd guess that it is keeping you somewhat sane too.
Steve
Excellent notes, so follow through with them, huh?!
Good advice. I hope your listening.
Mmmmmmm....bacon sandwiches....
But beware "Mamaste" might call you on your fatphobia, your view that drooling is something to be avoided and your patriarchal, anti-woman usage of the term "bitch". We wouldn't want that now, would we? Heh.
Psssst: You're doing fine, mama. XXOOXXOO
I think next time I'm on the internet all day, i will have a bacon sandwich and some wine. I should make a note of that. Yum! Love you Stress :- )
i do like the last one and may take it to brain.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so true!
Why is it every time you post something, I, with my conservative catholic upbringing want to stand up and wave my arms like I'm at a baptist revival and yell out "a-fucking-men! preach it sister stress!" you have strange & unusual effect on me.
Good notes, all of them.
F
With respect to your last note: fuck 'em if they can't take a joke. Eh?
Love the list. Especially the last one.
Hey, wanna come over and split a bottle of Chateau Bilgewater?
ARE YOU NUTS?!!! This is the PERFECT time to eat bacon sandwiches - this is the only time people won't look at you funny as you scarf one down...try 'em with peanut butter (my fav!).
I hear you about the last one...
Great list! Do what makes you feel good...fuck the rest of em
nts: Tell everyone who bugs me to fuck off. Twice.
Comments are closed.