March 12, 2002
-
Got.
Got a tooth loose and it's gonna fall out and I am going to look like a poster child for bad dental hygiene.
Got sciatica from lugging my lazy toddler back and forth from the bus stop. Isn't this an old-lady problem?
Got a major attitude about a client who's idea of a punchy ad reads like a software manual and who rejected 7 better design ideas in favour of something hackneyed even though I told him it was shit. Now he isn't returning emails and the deadline for the ad submission is Friday. Hey, I have a life outside of computers, geek.
Got a major jones on for home and family and sisters and all that loving stuff that I can only take for about a month before I need to head out for warmer climes and some autonomy. Doesn't matter, I miss them all so much I am dreaming about them.
Got a case of tired frustration with my teething toddler tyrant who can switch from angel to devil before I finish saying the words. I no sooner tell her off than I have to cuddle her cos she is melting into tears. I feel like I am in a Toddler-PMS nightmare that's retribution for all of mine. Make up your mind child,whether you are going to be a little cow or a little princess cos I am losing patience.
Got some irritation with my hub who's lost his 3rd mobile phone and is using mine. Which means I don't get calls and all my numbers are in the phone. And he seems to be mighty cavalier about getting a new one. Hey bub, since you fucked your credit over so badly, you need my signature on the contract.
Got some guilt over the fact said hub hasn't been laid in a month, not counting this morning at 4am when I told the toddler I was getting up to get a drink of water.
Got some mummy guilt about lying to toddler about previous sex-escapade.
Got some serious love beaming to my father who tho pedantic and a bit of an old curmudgeon is a big softy at heart.
Got some major annoyance going on with our dog who seems to have a gaseous bowel problem and there's something not quite right about having to vacate a comfortable chair in front of your favourite TV show because of the dog.
Got some fear about getting older and sliding into decrepitude (see teeth issue).
Got some weird shit going on in my head about dying and what it all means. Maybe it doesn't mean shit. Uh-oh.
Got some sorrow and some guilt and some grieving to do about my hope for another child.
Got a desire to dance to Jimi Hendrix after reading PinkDegas' blog. Yes. I also love the Grateful Dead. What I can remember of them, anyway.
Got some nostalgia for old loves, wondering what's going on and if their lives turned out the way they planned.
Got a longing that I could learn to be happy or learn to live in the moment, more like. I worry too much, I worry, I worry, and I worry.
Got a large amount of depression over the amount of snot my child can hold in her nose until she sneezes all over me.
Got a desire to go to Seattle this summer to see all my mama friends.
Got some shock and horror at the realisation that return trips to Seattle are $2200 Australian.
Got a deep abiding conviction that unless I win the lottery this ain't gonna happen. Oh well, there's the wading pool in the back garden and a blender.
Got a wish that there is life after death so I can see what kind of a woman my child turns out to be - because it's always unfinished, no matter how old you are - until you die.
Comments (8)
well, I don't know if it was what you were going for, but that was beautiful, really. No, I'm not kidding. It touched me. I want you in Seattle this summer, dammit, if for no other reason than to say "hey, it's all gonna work out" even if we all know it's a crock of shit.
*note to self: find 2200 for stressie & mousie to visit us this summer.
xoxo - fp
I hope you get to do all the things you want to do.
btw: thanks so much for your comment on my hendrix blog. your kind words meant a lot.
Is it a front tooth? Can you get one of those gold teeth, like a rapper? We gotta figure out some Send Stressie to Camp scheme. It has to happen.
Toddlers are just like that. Baby Jane is just starting to edge over that line and it's scaring the hell out of me.
I wanted SO much to talk on the phone with you today...erm but even though I am a grow'd up, I don't know how...? Sigh. I had sciatica when Em was Mouse's age. But then, I'm fucking old too, so no help there. I just made a comment on someone's blog who was BORN when I was a junior in high school...and she's a high school SENIOR. I had to go lie down...and come to think of it, I need to go lie down now.
I hope you get all you are looking for. Especially that money!!!
Growing old ain't for sissies. You've got a lot of good stuff there, Girl. I know you know that. Breath.
Good to know I'm not the only one with the "Got" syndrome. Got it too.
At least you are clear on your thoughts and feelings instead of muddling around without a clue.
Steve
I love the way you write about real, everyday things and make it sooo darned interesting. You have GOT a gift.
Comments are closed.